Accomplishment of the day

AOTD:

Correctly naming two actors from a movie for a bonus question on a science quiz.

From a movie I haven't even seen.

Yea, I'm that good.

Hell on Heels

Dear Self,

Remember this story I'm about to tell you. This isn't the first time I've warned you about wearing heels. And yet you don't listen.

So last night night you had a fancy event to go to. You picked out a cute dress, and decided you wanted to wear those new heels you got. You know, those poorly made $18 heels you found at the clearance rack at DSW? The black ones with the laces and cut out in the middle (that looked kinda sorta like this) with a heel higher than you have ever worn before? You said they were so comfy sitting down. You were right. Plus they were cheap. So you ignored their flaws and impracticality and bought them. And you kind of loved them. So you decided to wear them last night.

Big mistake. You hobbled from the car to the party like a drunk Barbie doll, taking small, calculated steps and holding onto everything in sight for support. You arrive at the party, ready to sit down and nibble on whatever vegetarian options they had.

It's a mingling event.

As in, no chairs.

Hooooly crap.

So you walk carefully, knowing that at some point during the night you will do one or more of the following:

a) Trip and fall

b) Trip, grab something/one for support, and have them topple down with you

c) Trip and break your ankle

d) Trip, fall, hit your head and kill yourself.

All for a pair of really cute shoes... So you gather all the courage you have (after all, despite the problems these shoes cause, they make you look tall and pretty awesome), and suck it up. You mingle, you chat, you eat faux-fancy food, and all the while your feet hurt more and more.

So you take to the habit of teetering on the balls of your feet and rotating your feet around in place, trying to a less-tender spot to rest on.

Then something happens. One of your legs kind of bends a little, and you think you know why. Your heel broke. You investigate. It didn't break. But it did bend so that it will probably be permanently bent, at least when you put pressure on it. You're shocked. Upset. You feel betrayed by your fun, spontaneous purchase.

Luckily the party is winding down. You walk even more slowly out of the venue, grabbing at columns and walls for support. You find a table and sit on it uncouthly, tugging at your heels ferociously. They come off. You moan in delight and pain. You look at your feet. They have red imprinted markings on them where the laces were. You leave and walk outside barefoot.

Never has the grass felt so nice on your bare feet.

So, Self, I hope you've listened intently. Just remember this next time you take those heels out for a spin, or find another cheap thrill at DSW. Neither will last...

Sincerely,

Me/you

PS: You need to learn to walk in heels so you don't look like Bambi taking her first steps. Seriously.

Oh boy

It's a lazy saturday at the RN household. I went upstairs to change from pajamas to "lounge wear." Which includes PJ pants. Oops.

So I change and then realize something: my pants, cardigan, and Tshirt are all navy blue. This is weird, albeit understandable because I love navy blue. Still, it's kind of odd. Then I realize something.

I'm wearing my only pair of BLUE underwear.

I don't know what all of this means, but it can't be good. I'm grabbing the cats and getting into my bomb shelter.

Not quite, but still. Freaky.

Glee vs. Ugly Betty

Within the past few days, I've noticed a plethora (fancy word count: 1) of striking similarities between two of my favorite shows, Ugly Betty and Glee. Shall we?

1. Both had (or will have) Kristen Chenoweth as a guest star (Betty's dentist/former gleek)

2. Both have (or had) Jamya Mays (Charlie/Emma) as a cast member

3. Both have awesome love-to-hate enemies (Wilhelmina/Sue)

4. Both have delightful gay guys (Mark/Kurt)

5. Both have wonderful fashion inspiration (Most Mode-ers/Rachel and Emma)

And here's the big one:

6. Both have had love triangles in which there's a guy (Henry/Mr. Schue/Finn) who is somehow romantically attached (via marriage, dating, etc) to "meh" girl (Charlie/Terri/Quinn) who he doesn't really love. But he does love the good girl (Betty/Emma/Rachel). But alas! "Meh" girl goes ahead and gets herself knocked up, forcing the guy to ditch the good girl in order to be a good father to his unborn child.

BONUS: In two of these instances, the baby may be the guy's... OR it could be the lover's (Dr. Farkas/Puck). Who knows? (Except we know, and in the former case it's the guys, and in the latter it's the lover's)

PS: I'm not bashing Glee for copying Ugly Betty, or vice versa. Every TV show has it's similarities with other TV shows. There's only so many plot lines you can run without going into crazy and/or inappropriate and/or boring territory.

Happy New Year

To all my Jewish readers, L'Shanah Tovah!

I don't know about you guys, but the best thing about Rosh Hashanah (and many jewish holdays) is the food. Mmmmm honey cake!

Dear Internet,

This is the cutest thing on you:

Nice Try

I went into the mall thinking: 

"Ok, I'm going to go to Pottery Barn, J. Crew, Old Navy, and Macy's. That's it. And I need pants, shirts, and cardigans. That's it. NO dresses. I have enough dresses. Oh, and I need shoes too. But nothing more."

I came out of the mall 2.5 hours later.

I went to Pottery Barn, J. Crew, Old Navy, Macy's, Hollister, American Eagle, Aerie, Gap, and Lord & Taylor's.

I got two dresses and a scarf.

Mission NOT accomplished.

Ode to J. Crew

Ah my dear J. Crew... 

I have a love affair with you.

Your clothes are chic and cute and nice

But your prices-- they make me think twice.

Your gorgeous dresses make me drool 

And I imagine wearing them to school.

But oh, 't'will never be, I know

Because $100 is a lot of dough.

And yet I still look, despite my sorrow

In hopes that it will go on sale tomorrow.

But even your sale section makes me sad

As good is gone, and bad is too bad.

I admit with delight that I have some of your clothes

But the desire for more lingers like the flow'ry stench of a rose.

(I added that apostrophe just for fanciness and fun

Because more apostrophes never hurt anyone!)

So to the outlet again I must leave

To buy more cardigans with rips in their sleeves.

Upon the sartorial leftovers I must feast

Snatching up clothes with the speed of a beast.

And now I must end, for I'm out of pics

Which I interspersed for prettiness and kicks.

So J. Crew, for you I have one plea:

Give us the goods without the large fee!

(Pictures aren't really mine:

They're from the J. Crew catalogue, online!)

 

You know you're crazy...

When you spend:

15 minutes narrowing your header font down to eight choices

30 minutes picking your new font out of the eight

30 minutes customizing said font to fit your needs

0 minutes on college stuff (or anything else you should be doing)

Crazy? Maybe.

Procrastinating? Yes.

PS: Do you like it?

Oh no!

Stress

+PJ pants

+ cold toes

+ laziness

+ dreading school

must =

SEPTEMBER :(