Hiatus

As much as it pains me, I'd hate for this blog to die a slow, painful death as it is now, with me updating once every few weeks. Instead, I will leave this blog up for you to enjoy and I may be back with a vengeance in the summer, but for now I'm going on hiatus. I know, don't you hate when bloggers do this? I do. But hopefully I won't upset my 3 followers too much. You'll just have to survive without my biting wit and hilarious insights for a few months, maybe more. College is tough (ugh, lame excuse, I know) and I've been having major writer's block. So farewell for now!
So sorry you guys!
-RN

A Day in the Life of a Band of Outsiders Model: James Marsden

WARNING: This post you are about to read contains over a dozen pictures of hottie James Marsden in silly situations wearing gorgeous clothing. Your computer's fan may have to work overtime to prevent overheating from the hotness of these images. You have been warned.

I never thought it was possible to love a men's clothing blog so much. But Band of Outsiders outfits many wonderful men in awesomely creative photo shoots. The shoots just look so... realistic! If you ever wondered what a celebrity like James Marsden, Andrew Garfield, or Donald Glover does in their spare time, now you know. Let's go through some of the highlights, shall we?

First up, the gorgeous and talented James Marsden.


James likes to start his day by playing with action figures-- no, wait, Pez dispensers-- in his underwear.
The Pez people have forgiven each other, and James is officiating their wedding.
Then it's time to fetch the paper! James lives in a building called "The Gaylord" (on the ground in barely discernible letters).
James then puts on his "I'm a serious actor" glasses and reads the newspaper in a foreign language. James doesn't speak the language, but he enjoys the pictures.
James works on his new business idea; he'll be a paparazzo... of himself! Such a simple money-maker for actors, James doesn't understand why other famous people let the paparazzi earn pictures they could take themselves!
Looking for some inspiration, James takes a trip to the roof. He keeps looking over his shoulder, however, as the security guard has been catching onto his habit.
Now it's the daily pool skimmer fight with the security guy at the pool! If he wins, he gets to swim. If his ninja-like jumping skills don't pay off and he loses, well then...
... then it's time to drink the sorrow away! If the drinking doesn't help his anger at being denied a swim, James will smash some old, valuable records. Because he's a movie star and he can.

To come later: A Day in the Life of Band of Outsiders models Andrew Garfield, Donald Glover, Dave Franco, and Leslie Mann.

(all photos courtesy of Band of Outsider's blog-- check them out! They have pictures of hot guys wearing nice clothing. What else could you ask for?)

Madeline Weinrib

What do you guys think of my new header? I'm finally satisfied, after a few failed attempts. I think I'll be keeping this one for a while. To celebrate, let's talk about some pretty things!


Madeline Weinrib is amazing. Her rugs, her pillows, her fabric-- everything. Especially her rugs. Right next to my goal of learning how to walk in heels is my goal of owning a gorgeous Madeline Weinrib rug. Both, I predict, will be difficult to complete, as the former requires a sense of balance I don't have, and the latter, a lot of money, which I also don't have. But for now I can visit her website and imagine walking around in 4-inch heels on her divine rugs in my New York loft/Greenwich mansion/LA beach house. Hey, a woman can dream!

This will go in the ultra-swanky living room, paired with rich jewel-tones like emerald and magenta.

This will go in my living room when we revamp it for summer (yes, we will redecorate for every season).

This will go in my sun room, surrounded by... sun. I don't know, I just love this rug.

This will go in my daughter's room, which will be pink but sophisticated, with clean lines and bright patterns. And a bed with a canopy, because I always wanted one of those.

This is probably my absolute favorite. It will go in my walk-in closet, which will be girlie and spacious with lots of white and glass and sunlight.

What pieces are you lusting after? Where will you put them in your future home? (Note: The more grandiose the plans, the better. Go ahead, give yourself a pet tiger.)

(all pics from Madeline Weinrib's website)

A Letter to Campbell's Soup

Dear person who does the advertising for Campbell's soup company,

If you wouldn't mind answering this (not that you get so much mail you won't have time for this-- you're not a celebrity, hate to break it to ya), I'd love to know what possessed you to put out not one, not two, but THREE full-page advertisements in the February 7, 2011 issue of People magazine. Yes, I know, one was for "Healthy Request" soup (which is a lame name, by the way, but I suppose you aren't in charge of that), the other was for "Select Harvest Light," and the last for "Spaghetti-O's." Obviously you are trying to reach the broke-couple, fat-single-lady, and mom-with-no-time-to-feed-her-children-uncanned-food demographics all in one magazine. Kudos for the ambition. But to me, a college student who falls under non of those categories, it just seems like you're trying to hard. It's pathetic. Get your act together.
By tripling the ad space, you do not triple my desire to buy your soup (or Spaghetti-O's, which would be canned pasta I suppose? How the heck do you categorize Spaghetti-O's (other than under "nostalgic" and "yummy"?) And if you were to be required to use three ad pages, maybe make the first two remotely different. What the heck is the difference between "Healthy Request" and "Select Harvest Light"? Apparently, Healthy Request is low cholesterol, has 0 grams of fat, a healthy level of sodium, and 25 varieties, while Select Harvest Light has 80 calories or less, is 100% natural and deliciously satisfying. And it looks disgusting. In an ADVERTISEMENT. Which is not a good sign that it'll look appetizing in real life.
Why do you have two different health-conscious brands? It's confusing. It's bad advertising.
In conclusion, Campell's Soup Co., you may want to go a different direction with your advertising techniques (I'm available for consultation. But no, I will not be paid in soup). But, most of all, thank you for allowing me the chance to rant on the internet instead of starting my paper. Thank you.
Your critic,
A Random Nobody

3 Websites I Love Right Now

1. Netflix.com

My one and only (legal and fail-safe) source for old SNL episodes. I'm loving the Maya Rudolph/Tina Fey/Amy Poehler/Jimmy Fallon era. My favorite sketches include Two A-Holes, The Needlers, and Weekend Update.

2. ASOS.com


Bravo, ASOS, bravo. You've successfully ruptured my heart with longing for this gorgeous dress (Plus it's in 2 of my favorite dress colors-- cream and navy!). Bravo.

3. WhenParentsText.com
The texts sometimes make me wish my parents were as cool as the ones posted; sometimes, they make me glad my parents are relatively normal. Every time, they amuse me to no end.

What are your favorite sites-du-jour?

Watch this video NOW

Video non-embeddable. Boo. Watch here.
And, just like that, I have a new celebrity crush. And I believe you do as well now.


How could you not?
He's British.
And hot.
And he knows his internet memes.
What's not to love?
(It's Andrew Garfield, btw, from The Social Network and the new Spiderman movie)

"It looks like something a death row convict would make in art therapy."

Question: Your afternoon class in canceled. What do you do?

Answer: Do five minutes of homework so you feel accomplished, then watch Parks and Recreations season 2 on Netflix and play Text Twist.


Thank you, Professor-whose-name-I-don't-know-because-we've-only-had-one-class.

I want...

- more vacation time
- my nail polish to be unchippable... it only lasted for 3 or so days this time...
- new 30 Rock/Community/Parks and Rec
- a tiger


(cute tiger pic from here)

Change is in the air!

New year, new layout, new color scheme.
You like?

My Psych season 5 finale review

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR LAST NIGHT'S EPISODE OF PSYCH. WATCH, THEN READ.

Am I the only one who thought Psych's season finale was disappointing? I went into it with high hopes, because the other two parts of the Yin-Yang trilogy were very creepy/awesome, and yet this one just fell very flat for me. Here's my thoughts on the episode:

- I was totally unimpressed by the reveal of Shawn's previous tie to Yang. Why wouldn't Shawn, the man with the infallible memory, not remember an especially odd encounter like his with Yang? And what was the deal about that shirt he wore? Was there a reason Henry didn't remember it? They made that out to be such a big deal, but in the end, he just forgot about that shirt? Surely Shawn didn't wear it only once.
- I'll admit, when Yang mentioned her and Shawn's "romantic history," I totally thought she raped him or something, and he didn't remember because it was traumatizing and he tried to forget. Please tell me someone else thought this and I'm not totally insane. I guess rape is too much for a comedy, though, especially when Shawn would be strapped with that emotional baggage for the rest of the series' run.
- Granted, she's the daughter of a serial killer, so she's allowed to be completely nutso, but was it ever explained why the heck Yang developed this weird obsession with Shawn and his family?
- The whole Yin/Yang father/daughter reveal was a little blah for me. I already thought they were married or something, so when she said "daddy," I was just like "Oh. That makes more sense I guess." But, if the reveal was done right, I should've been like "OMGWTF?!? AHH MY BRAIN JUST DIED!"
- There was no real sense of danger. They weren't going to kill Gus, so when Yin is ready to needle him, I thought he would inject it and it would turn out to be a placebo or something. I'm kind of sad this wasn't the case because it would've been kind of hilarious to see Gus in a situation where he should be dying but isn't. I can just imagine the subsequent banter...
- There were so few clues! The one in Shawn's bedroom, the bag of videos in the field, and the letter in the mailbox, which wasn't really a clue at all. I loved seeing Shawn solve those weird clues in the first part of the trilogy.
- I did like how Henry slipped up when describing Shawn's psychicness in front of everyone-- called it his "abilities" and then switched to "sense" or something, if I remember correctly. It was bound to happen some time.
- I LOVED seeing Mary (that was his name, right?) again! He wore a unitard. He was hilarious. I miss him. It made me miss the previous trilogy episodes.
- Shawn's mom (What's her name?? Aahhh I forget) was totally useless in this episode. All she did was reveal that she took a picture of Shawn and Yang, but other than that, why was she there? I would almost rather a neighbor had taken the photo, because it is kind of weird that she took the photo of them together but did not even vaguely remember her face or voice-- doesn't she have like perfect auditory memory or something? Wasn't that established? I'm sure she heard Yang when Yang captured her-- why didn't she remember then?
- I kind of wish Yin was someone we had met before, or at least someone closer emotionally to Shawn. Introducing a new character as the big bad villain of the entire trilogy just didn't give it any emotional gravity. It was just another crazy bad guy. He should've had some relation to someone other than Yang.
- I LOVE YANG. There, I said it. She's kind of hilarious and oddly sweet. And crazy, of course. I want more of her. I want her to start working with Shawn and Gus. They need a girl to make a round, classic protagonist/BFF/girl trio. But this time, the girl would not be a romantic interest for the BFF (see: Harry Potter) or the protagonist (see: Lizzie MacGuire with a gender reversal)

What did you think of the finale? Care to agree with me or present a counter-argument?

A Holiday Treat

Blogger's block... I haz it. To apologize for my lack of posts, enjoy some Schweddy Balls:

Soulmates

After watching The Royal Tenenbaums for the first time, I noticed something...



Chas Tenenbaum and Sue Sylvester are soulmates... well, at least their tracksuits are. And do formal occasions get in the way of their tracksuit wearing? OF COURSE NOT.

Here's Chas, modeling the funereal black tracksuit:

And Sue, donning the tracksuit wedding dress-- perfect for marrying yourself!

To sum up...
Awesome people wear tracksuits. All. the. time.

(pictures here, here, here, and here)

Caption this!

So this screencap of Will watching the Warblers' performance at Regionals (or is it Sectionals? I DON'T REMEMBER, so sue me. Don't Sue me though. EDIT: Just checked. It's Sectionals. I'll hand over my Gleek badge now.) is incredibly amusing to me for whatever reason. And it's just dying for a caption. Have a look and give it a go:

Why does Will look so transfixed/disturbed/possessed? Any ideas? Tell me!

(screencap from this SPOILERY video of tomorrow's episode)

The Pillow Returns

There is something wrong with my brain. It is too detail-oriented. Every time I rewatch a TV show, I notice little funny props, probably meant to be seen by no one, like this and this and this.

And now Glee has been subjected to my intense gaze.

Remember in the pilot when Sandy Ryerson, former Glee coach, is in Sheets n Things? Here he is to refresh your memory:

"Oh god, don't you love a good monkey?"

In episode four, Preggers, Sue visits Sandy at home, and guess what we see?

Over to the right... let's zoom in:

Sandy totally went back to get that pillow after Will left. Hilarious!

Notice any background gags lately?

Deathly Hallows WOW

So I, like the rest of the world, went to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1. And I just have to do a huge thought dump on you, because I just need to write them down. Enjoy:

- I wish the Dursley's got a better goodbye. Frankly, they could've taken away that pointless scene of Ron standing outside the burrow and added some kind of book-like goodbye.

- Bellatrix is kind of freaking awesome. She's just totally insane and it rocks.

- The 7 Potters scene was awesome, though the introductions were kind of awkward. "Hi, I'm Bill. I'm a Weasley, but you should be able to tell that because I have red hair. See these scars on my face? Greyback did that. Who's Greyback? Ah, never mind."

- And WTF Moody? Cutting Tonks off mid-announcement? I don't know how they're going to finagle this because **SPOILER FOR PART 2** they've cast a 19-years-later Teddy, so we know he has to exist. But basically the scene where the next movie should open is the scene when Lupin announces his birth. I can see it now...

(Knock on door)

BILL: Oh gosh, who could it be?

(Opens door, LUPIN comes in)

LUPIN: Tonks had the baby!!

EVERYONE: WTF?

HARRY: Tonks was pregnant?

LUPIN: Oh yea, did I forget to tell you guys? We were going to tell you at Privet drive, but Moody interrupted us.

HERMIONE: What about at the Burrow?

LUPIN: Well, Moody was dead, so that didn't quite seem the right time. Then the wedding, and we didn't want to steal Bill and Fleur's thunder.

BILL: Oh, I guess that makes sense.

LUPIN: Yep. Well, it's a boy. We've named him Ted, after Dora's father.

HARRY: Never met him.

LUPIN: You didn't? You were supposed to go there after Privet drive but... change of plans, I guess. He was killed.

FLEUR: Oh. sorry.

LUPIN: It's okay. Hey Harry, wanna be godfather?

HARRY: Uh, sure, I guess. Just don't die, okay? (laughs)

LUPIN: Haha, I'll try not to!

AND SCENE *bows*

- The wedding scene was so short! I could've used waaay more of it.

- And is it just me or does Lupin have a habit of grabbing Harry or yelling at him to stop? Think about it... Order of the Phoenix, after Sirius dies (no yelling this time); Half Blood Prince, at the Burrow (Pretty sure he says "Harry, don't!"); and now after 7 Potters with the grindylow question, and also at the wedding. Lupin, no need to worry about the boy that LIVED. Better off worrying about yourself, because, well...

- True story: I teared up at Hedwig and Dobby's deaths, while when reading them I didn't. Especially Hedwig's-- I knew what was coming but OMG NO it was so sad.

- I'm interested to see some deleted scenes from this movie. I saw a behind the scenes clip of when they are in the Burrow surrounding George and Harry talks about trusting everyone in the room or something, but it wasn't in the movie.

- Every time Harry let the snitch out and then grabbed it to put away (happened maybe 3 or 4 times), some dude yelled out "GRYFFINDOR WINS!" The only significant heckle in the movie, which surprised me, seeing as I saw it at midnight with a bunch of drunk college students.

- The audience cheered when Dobby came on screen. I didn't know he was popular-- probably just in preparation for what's to come.

- The ministry scene was my favorite, by far. Ron getting into his role as Cattermole ("this'll be something to tell the kids!") and Harry's counterpart just being so... awkward, in a hilarious way.

- Oh, Harry. Hermione mentions that they should've polyjuiced themselves for Godric's Hollow and Harry's all "No. This is where I was born." Oh Harry, you're so logical. I forgot that when you visit your birthplace, you're automatically protected from harm and recognition. HARRY U SO STUPID.

- I hate the Bathilda scene in the books, and same with the movie. Not because it was poorly done, but because it's so friggin CREEPY and scary! There were a lot of nervous/anticipatory groans as Bathilda came on screen. I just kept watching through my fingers, waiting for her to turn into Nagini, and thankfully when she did, it wasn't as gruesome as the books. But WHY oh WHY did Hermione and Harry wait for a good 3 seconds in complete silence and stillness before Nagini attacked them a second time (and gave me a heart attack). It was like "I dunno, let's wait to apparate till we see the snake again. I wanna say goodbye." WTF?

- The audience (including me) laughed when Ron was explaining how the deluminator brought him back... this scene isn't supposed to be funny!

- Emma Waston rocked the torture scene.

- Why the heck were Hermione and Ron just standing there watching while Dobby died in Harry's arms? Harry was totally like "WTF you guys, get some dittany or something, we're WIZARDS for christ's sake!"

- Speaking of Dobby, I couldn't hear what he said as he was dying (probably too many people wailing preemptively), but I don't think I liked it. Wish they would've stuck with him just saying "Harry... Potter..." and dying.

- Again speaking of Dobby, where was his gravestone?? I really think they should have shown "Here lies Dobby, a free elf." It was so poignant in the books.

- I totally wanted someone to shout "KISS!" as Voldy faced Dumbledore. That's the one time in the movie I wish there was an annoying heckler!

- It was only after seeing the movie that I realized that 90% of the dialogue in the movie does not come from the books. And you know what? I don't really mind. I mean, it's weird to think about, but the point is if I didn't even notice that when I was watching the movie, then that's a good sign.

Overall, awesome movie, loved it (couldn't you tell?) and I can't wait for July!

What did you guys think of the movie? Likes? Dislikes? WTFs? Tell me!

(image from here)

Weekend Update secret-- revealed!

You know how you see everyone on Weekend Update only from the waist-up? Well, Jason Sudeikis (as George W Bush) is business on the top, casual on the bottom:

Unless George W really has embraced casual friday (or saturday, in this case) and decided the new look was coat and tie and exercise shorts... It makes a lot of sense here though-- especially if he has a quick change after his appearance-- but it's funny nonetheless and confirms those "Do news reporters really wear pants?" suspicions. Has anyone else noticed this on SNL before?

I wonder if Seth Meyers and all Weekend Update guests do this-- heck, I wonder if Brian Williams and Ann Curry do it!

(image via hulu.com)

Why I wish this were a picture from my life

(This is the Tory Burch family chariot electric tricycle, from the Neiman Marcus gift guide thingy. Never has a tricycle been so lust-worthy)

1. I would have friggin adorable doggies-- dressed up with what looks like friggin adorable colorful collars

2. I don't know where I'm going with flowers, a baguette, and a bottle of something fancy looking, but clearly I'm going there in STYLE.

3. Can we just take a moment to appreciate the amazing gorgeosity of this bike? The royal/baby blue color combo is to die for (notice how the pedals and handles are baby blue as well-- details!!), as is the tie-dye-meets-ikat pattern. LOVE.

4. I'm clearly somewhere beautiful and sunny, with lush greenery, flowers, cobblestones, and a very pretty old-fashioned street lamp. I'm imagining Central Park, what about you?

5. I'm able to spend $4,500 on a totally not practical bicycle, so I'm obviously rich with very good taste. So my life rocks.

Conclusion: I want those dogs. I want that bike. I want to be in a park that looks like that. I want to lounge on the seat with my doggies while my boyfriend-- Zac Efron? Darren Criss? Penn Badgley?-- drives me around.

I WANT TO GO TO THERE.

(image here)

Dear self,

Oh, sweetie. When will you ever learn? We've been through this already. Twice.

You're a smart girl, but you have to stop deluding yourself into thinking you can wear three-inch heels outside, having only worn them around the store and your room before.

I know, the boots are gorgeous and you want to show them off. But when you waddle around like a constipated penguin because you're so wobbly than you have to take super tiny steps, people will be looking at you, not the shoes. And you will not look good.

I know you need to wear them out to wear them in-- I get it. But take it slow, hun. Don't prance out in public with your three-inch heels just yet. You look like a drunk Bambi on stilts. It's not a pretty sight.

But you will get there, I promise. One day, you will strut around NYC in your 4-inch stilettos-- I promise.

But right now? Stick to flats.

Love,

Yourself

HALP for Halloween

I need halp. I need inspiration.

HALLOWEEN IS COMING UP AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT I SHOULD BE!

Anyone else having this problem?

I want to be creative with the clothes and stuff I already have, but you can only get so creative with jeans and sweaters...

So I've thought of some options that may not be right for me, but maybe they'll inspire you, my lovely readers! And then, you can take your inspiration and use it to come up with a fabulous idea for me! See how this works? I iz so smart.

Options I've thought of:

1. Hermione: Grey cardi/sweater+White button up+Pleated mini skirt+ Grey knee-high socks+black ballet flats+two pencils taped together for a wand+Hogwarts crest printed out and taped/pinned to cardi+ Frizzy hair (one of the only downsides of this outfit-- maybe I could get away with movie-Hermione hair, AKA not as frizzy)

Why not? Too dorky for college? I just know I'll look out of place next to a bunch of girls dressed as strippers (OK, maybe they're not dressed as them, but they look like them!)

2. '20s Girl: '20s style dress (which I just happen to have, $5, never worn, from F21)+Pearls+Red lipstick+Black tights+Black heels+up do

Why not? I WILL FREEZE TO DEATH BECAUSE IT IS A SPAGHETTI STRAP DRESS. I have the perfect jacket to go with it, but it's at home and 5 sizes too big...

3. Black Cat (Cat Woman?): Black leggings (or Black tights+black shorts)+Black shirt+Kitty ears

Why not? YAWN.

4. Blair Waldorf, Season 1: White button up+Navy skirt+navy knee-highs+ballet flats+Headband

Why not? Not sure if people would get it, especially since it's from season one (the Constance uniform)

(pics from here, here, here, and here)

Did you know...

(you probably didn't, because it's useless, but I'll tell you anyway)..

... that SNL's intro announces the cast in alphabetical order?

Yep. By last name. Just realized it.

So there's your new bit of knowledge for today. You can stop looking for something new to learn now. Your quota has been filled. Your welcome.